Monday, August 31, 2009

There are somethings that are better not known.

10:52 PM

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Mayat talked to me today all of a sudden,
It was quite shocking.
Well, we are friends, so it doesn't matter.
Ignore the past...
Haha. Tak sangka he miss talking to me.
Lols, I having PMS, so Mayat had to layan my nonsense all the way!
Even though the talk is short, it was interesting.

Anyways, some people really misunderstood.
Between my Sayang & Darling.
Gosh. They are two different people!
Darling understand what I mean.
Haha. Thanks Darl, for spotting my spelling error.
But I lazy change. Hehe. Try to come on the 11 Sep okies.

11:50 PM

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Great! PMS!
Right now I really miss my Sayang,
Wish to talk with him on the phone.
But I know I should not.
Hmms.
Wondering what is he doing now.

Gosh, I was dying to read the book "Rona"
By Cikgu Ishak. & Haj forget to bring it.
No books to read for weekends! Bored!!
Somemore I very lazy to head down to Library!
Haj, better don't forget to bring on Mon alrights.

Ouh, I am counting down!
Let's see.. 14 more days till sweet 16 is gone!!
Heehee.. & 13 more days to meet my Darlings again.
Gosh. I miss them banyak banyak!
We heading down to KFC @ Paya Lebar!
The place where we always eat donner together in the past.
That will be a memory I will never forget!!
LOOKING FORWARD!!! Woooots~

8:49 PM

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

He called.
I couldn't even say a word.
I just kept quiet listening to him.
I miss him and yet I do not show it.
I love him and yet I did not say it.
Saying powerful words means a lot.
And it is very hard to say it out.

I regret.

For what I told you two days ago.

The truth is, I was jealous.

I know I do not have the rights to feel that way.

But I can't help it.

7:34 PM

Friday, August 21, 2009

I only got prompt twice for Oral.
Is that good or not? Hmms.
Nvm, shall concentrate on what's next,
Which is Malay prelim.
Whatever happens around me,
Dissapoint me a lot.
Not only I lost you.
But I lost others too.
I don't need anyone to understand me.
I just need someone to be there for me.
Right now, I don't know how long I will stand.
I keep letting time pass by, without thinking of gaining it back.
I am sorry for the change.
Turning back to the old Hidayah, will just make me fall.
You will never know what I feel. You will never know what I think. So just let it be.

8:46 PM

Thursday, August 20, 2009

I miss him to much.
Its been nearly 3 days.
Not a word from him.

Even though I did not pass my S.S & History.
I know I have improved.
Now I have to buck up in other subject too!

To certain people:
You guys know what am I feeling lately.
I have no time for jokes or entertainment.
Leave me a lone for the time being, okay?

ps: All I need is just for you to understand me.

6:02 PM

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

To Someone whom I was close with once,
I know.
The Hidayah whom you once knew, changed.
I do not want to say anything.
Cause you might find it as an excuse.
But whatever it is.
You are still my friend.
I will be by your side, when you have problems.
Or when you need someone to talk to.
Whatever I think about you.
I shall keep that comment to myself.
For now, I shall end my message here.

For most of my friends,
I know I have stop hanging out with most of you.
I need time to be alone.
If you guys think I spent most of time with my boyfriend.
Then, YOU ARE WRONG!
ps: On MSN & reality. I am two different person.

11:54 PM

Family
Everything became worst this year.
A lot of shocking happenings.
Which made me stress & broke down into tears.
However, there is still some good things.
I got a new younger sister.
Really looking forward to meet her.

Studies
I regret coming to Sec 5.
For Prelims, I am last for every subject.
It really sucks.
However, for O level I shall study harder.
Instead of aiming not to be last in class.
I shall aim to get better grades.

Friends
Its getting harder to trust most of you.
Its getting harder to tolerate with some of your behaviors.
But that does not mean, I hate you guys.
You guys still meant a lot to me.
Even though there bad things happen between us,
The good memories will always remain within.

Boyfriend
You tolerate my nonsense.
You hurt and heal my heart.
Don't ask me why,
Iloveyou.
& I miss every single thing about you.

8:41 PM

Friday, August 14, 2009

Went to Temasek Polytechnic today.

Boyfriend, thanks for the treat and accompanying me.
Your friends are really cool and funny. Don't forget to mention friendly too.
Anyways, I want to do better in Maths than you!
Since you got B3 for your O level.
So I must get B3, A2 or A1.
Which I hope is possible.
Gosh. You teach me Vectors while I teach you Sets, can?

Prelims are over.
Confirm, I will have a lot of failing grades.
And even though there will be a lot of last minute revision.
I shall not give up hope. *peace*

Guy,
You are to young to understand me.
I know you are shock when you heard the news.
But lets see each other as friends okay?
Take cares.

10:10 PM

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Well, Physics & Chemistry paper was quite okay.
Luckily I studied.
*peace*
Looking forward to 19 August 2009!
Malay O level result will be on that day!
Gosh. Please give me a B3 and above.

I keep reading novel this few days.
Gosh, I miss reading books!
I wish someone would buy for me a novels as a birthday present!
I love reading suspense, horror and romance stories!
Hmms. I better start revising on Combine Humanities!
I did made improvement in History, now I want make improvement in Social Studies too!
Boyfriend, please help in my maths can?

I know you keep having projects.
And have to keep sleeping late.
But don't be to stress okay?
Jiayo!

11:20 PM

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

After what happen today.
It really kills me.

Boy,
When you enter my life.
I realise so many things.
Even though we had similarities.
After hearing you, I felt my life was so fake.
Why didn't I get to know you earlier.?
The more I know you. The more stronger the feelings grow.
Without even telling, you knew I had problems.
You make me confuse. You make me regret.
Why do I feel you mean so much to me?

Gal,
You are one of my friend whom I trust.
Please ignore this past of mine.
I don't want to remember it.
I am already tangle in a spider web.
I know you are angry for what I did.
I am sorry.
I don't know how to explain to you the situation.
But I just hope you close an eye about it for now.

9:47 PM

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I really regret for what happen today.
I was to shy that I ran off instead of meeting you.
Gosh. Anyways, Nurul! I miss you babe! You owe lots of hugs!

I don't really know what to do now.
I am stubborn. Ego? Maybe?
Give me time to think.

Boy, I miss the date 11 July 2009.

9:35 PM

Sunday, August 9, 2009

8 Aug 2009
Went shopping with Kai Jie last minute.
First we went to Tampines One. And none of the clothes interest us.
Then, we went to Marina Square. Saw Cousin Bob. And the hot guy from G-star & Fusion dance perform!
*melts*
After a few rounds looking for Kai Jie formal clothes.
I decided to voice out my opinion on his dressing.
And we plan to buy Topman clothes instead of the formal ones next Tuesday.
Gosh. I really miss hanging out with Kai Jie.
Looking forward to go out with the F4!

Fireworks was great.

I miss talking to you!

12:02 PM

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Player,
You & I got something in common :)

1:19 AM

Friday, August 7, 2009

The barrier I have created once was demolished.
And now I, I have created a new barrier.
This time I will make sure no one demolished this barrier.

Do you know you were the first person to demolish that barrier?
Whenever I am alone, that barrier will be gone.
Thinking of you..

7:36 PM

Thursday, August 6, 2009

FCUK! I AM BEGINNING TO HATE MYSELF!

3:53 PM

Sunday, August 2, 2009

I was chatting with 9 people at one go!
Sorry if I got wrong chat.
Anyways, I was laughing my ass off just now.
My friend turn me into a horny person!
Oh me gosh!

Anyways, I am tired of teaching E maths today.
So, I just have to wish good luck for my science practical tomorrow.
*pray hard*

Gosh! Why do some people have the wrong idea?
I don't have any feelings for any of my close Chinese guy friends!!
Just because I am close to them doesn't mean I like them!

I will be sleeping late today.
Tomorrow school starts late!

T.L,
There is someone special that I already care for.

9:02 PM

Saturday, August 1, 2009

I am seriously pissed with her now.
Basically, I always listen to whatever she says ever since young.
I did whatever she ask me to.
Seriously, this is not the first time she talk to me about all those stupid crap!
Honestly speaking, I don't believe love exist between us!
What I am doing now is all because I feel that it is my responsibility as a daughter.
I only care for you. That's why I am doing whatever I think is right!

T.L,
I really appreciate if you stop wanting to know about my love life.
I only tell certain people about it and I am not who you really think I am.
I only see you as a normal friend. No more no less.
And yes, the personal message on my MSN always refer to a certain person.
Lastly, I don't hate anyone. Even though how bad that person is, I most of the time only think the good side of him or her.

9:04 PM